For The Love Of Chip

How long will I grieve over my pet?  I do not understand the tremendous grief one encounters over losing a pet.  I remember taking him for a walk in freezing weather.  I did not want to go out in the cold and wind but I did it to make him happy.   He looked so sad if I did something without him. Animals are so in tune to your behavior that they have really good instincts on what will happen next. He was like a child waiting to go get ice cream or a ride in the car.  I frequently took him to a park where we could walk by a creek.  He loved getting a drink, but was never too happy about getting his paws wet.

Chip has been always afraid of bad weather.  He needed to be with someone when it was stormy.  Much like a little child he never seemed certain that he was safe during thunder and lightning.  He became restless and appeared worried. He would try to rest but he never could relax until the storm passed.

I wonder if he knew death was imminent.  I suspect animals are in tune with declining health and possibly accepting of the next steps that follow. Death should be a relief to an injured or unhealthy animal.  However, the pet lover is unable to accept the impending death.

Is grief this difficult with humans?  I remember crying for days when my dad died. As I held my head down at the funeral I remember watching tears bouncing off my dress as I refused to look up.  Pet death is a different type of grief. It seems more hopeless and more child like.   It is difficult to work effectively because I keep tearing up. Carrying a Kleenex is a dead giveaway that I might crumble.   All the good memories come rolling in, and if  I give too much thought I start to cry.

I hope this pain is over soon.  I did not know his death would have such an affect on me.  Animals are such needy creatures for food, exercise, and love.  It makes them seem so vulnerable and more like children.

I think I have found true love with my pet.  I do not think I have ever felt such emotion with anyone or anything before other than my children.  He cannot be replaced, and I do not want another dog to take his place. It would just seem wrong and unfair.  Pets are truly a gift from God.  They love you unconditionally.  I hope Chip knew how much he meant to so many people.  For now there is no joy without him.  Thanks to James Coleman for this wonderful gift.